Help George, please

“Hello.”

Hello George old mate, is that you? This is Johnny ……. from Orstralia.”

“Yep, this is me, too right it is an’ all. What can I do for you, pardner?”

“Well, you know how I'm helping you out with that Iraq thing, I was wondering if you could help me out with a situation we have here at the moment?”

Well sure I can, you just tell me what is botherin’ you.”

Well George, it seems I went and opened my mouth about how I was going to fix; just like that, the problems of our Aboriginal people in the Northern Territory (it’s sort of like our Texas) but it seems that it’s going to be a little harder than I thought an’ I’m getting’ a little bit worried that it might all go pear-shaped. Then I was thinking that the situation was a little bit like that Iraq business where you said it would all be over in a week or two but then it got worse and then, after a few years you came up with the brilliant idea of sending in some extra troops and instead of calling them reinforcements, which has connotations of losing, you called them a 'surge', which is very clever because it has very positive connotations and I was wonderin' if ... er ...”

“So John, you need some help?”

“Yup, I sure do, ol’ buddy. I thought about how you had all those problems with the Apache, Sioux and Cree an’ all and I figured you’d be just the one to help me out here. ”

“Consider it done, pardner. I’ll have an aircraft carrier off the coast by next week. US Marines will be parachutin’ down all over that Terry Tory’s place by mornin’. Don’t yo’all worry about a thing now. If any of those Ab-or-ig-e-knees get uppitty, just yo’all tell ‘em your brother George is comin’.”

“Yo’all don’t know how much better that makes me feel here, Down Under, George.”

“Whoa now, let’s not get carried away, Johnno. This is strictly business. I never knew you were like that.”